Misnomer.

I knew of this woman growing up whom all the kids made fun of and were skeptical about. This person wore dresses and identified as a woman, though she was initially, biologically, a he. I didn’t know of any fetish, or deep-seeded reasons why she did this at the time, I just saw it as a choice. Her name was Janice and through coincidental run-ins throughout life, either at the Wal-Mart or a gas station or seeing her from the playground at school, this woman was definitely more significant because of what she chose to show the world versus what we all thought she should be. The agenda of a small town where what I gathered to be a strict boundary between male and female ranged from women being "housewives," and less say in the house’s finances, to a man who chooses to write rather than play sports being a “faggot.”

The problem wasn’t in what Janice decided to do with herself, but that she chose differently than other people’s beliefs. People allowed this to be THEIR problem. Janice wasn’t the problem, others' inabilities to allow bygones be bygones were. Intolerance, depicted in all sorts of ways, is exactly what we see today, on a larger scale, on a more prominent stage. Discrimination isn’t dead any more now than it was in “the olden days,” it is just more upfront. This, I believe, set-off by the election of Donald Trump as President.

The cover has been taken off and people are exposed for the façade they put on; a presentation of unity that never existed. Over time, it became socially unacceptable to openly discriminate or expose your underlying "racist," tendencies. So, as is with things, what is popular is not always right, people suppressed their true feelings and put up a front that crumbled when nobody was looking. When the white man who works with a black man makes his jokes with his white co-workers about “fried chicken” or “watermelon-flavored” anything. The black man can make his jokes too, believe me, we provide plenty of material, (such as our tendency to mimic stereotypical aspects of another’s culture). None of this is anything new, it is just being discussed now. Cancer underneath the skin has to be poked, prodded and surgically removed before things can get any better, so why not society, why not people as a whole?

Sometimes I need the reminder that I cannot truly put myself in the shoes of someone who has been oppressed because I haven’t been. I have had the silver spoon of society and can only attempt to fathom what oppression feels like. It’s not fair, but I am on the winning end. Janice wasn’t though. Our background according to appearance prior to the external transformation were similar, we are white, we were considered male, yet she felt different. She was oppressed, being made fun of without her awareness at times. Kids yelled out on the playground, words I was unfamiliar without the time, words I would later be called for thinking anything, “different.” Adults avoided and traffic honked as they passed. The turmoil this woman went through because of something she decided to show the world. Something she may have felt on the inside all along, now being exposed to the world as truth, only to be met with this?

Why do we chastise that which we cannot understand, separate what we feel is different? These stereotypes have a biological purpose and though I had never interacted with a woman of this nature, up until that point in my life, I didn’t feel any danger. I had no reason to feel any of that. Was I more uncomfortable with myself, seeing someone comfortable with themselves? Were people scared that they would like this person or understand them, thus deeming them “different,” too?

A misrepresentation is what happens when a leader is chosen and when they speak for the people. A misrepresentation that makes people uncomfortable because it is not their exact words, they are bound by a decision from another. Yet, we still have our freedoms, we still have our beloved country, her land, and our beloved culture. The same culture that oppresses those who are different in subtle yet, abusive ways. No, we do not allow abuse without a consequence. The government is not supposed to allow anyone to feel threatened or violated, though that is up for debate, but what is allowed is so far into the line in the sand that it’s almost more offensive to have a line at all. It may be better for the oppressed, the different, to be abused physically, because the subtle scars caused by these passive acts of disingenuousness are long-lasting and rarely taken as serious.

I am guilty, as is anyone at one time. We are told it is biology, that these things make sense in the brain due to snap judgements needing to be made. We continue to stay separated as though we could not understand one another, as though we are too far removed from the President to give him any credit at all. Change doesn’t happen in office or with a person in power, change happens within the people. We have our own individual choices and our own individual beliefs as to why we choose what we do. The problem lies where it always has, in us, in our beliefs, in our judgements left unaltered. We are the problem as a collective and until this is understood or at least partially grasped, can we actually get any closer to acceptance and peace.

This may only happen in the absence of the only creature that has the gift of awareness, or should I say, the collective product of the environment made up of the same people that complain about it.  

Another misnomer is when someone's perceived body is looked upon with desire, but to that person they are ugly. Click here.