Pizza Break

I am one now. I have a child and for the first time, I have an obligation in which I am no longer, "Free to do as I wish." This feeling isn't unique, for parenting is as natural as a bowel movement. We have our own lives for a short while, a trial run to see if we can take care of ourselves first. We are supposed to learn, not just to care, but discipline and be an example to. We are expected through some divine force, without a manual mind you, to contribute with the greatest gift we have to offer; an extension of ourselves. My father did the best he could. He raised four boys in a household of chaos, discontentment, and on the other end, this time now, we are alive, well, and in touch. Sure there are things easy to piece apart, things my experience in counseling has led me to see, things that my siblings wouldn't see, things they shouldn't see. We are free of jail, all limbs in tact, work, and contribute in some way to the positives more than the negatives of...

Time on earth seems to be associated with a sort of wisdom we are all expected to respect. Time on earth allows for enough ups and downs of experience that the survivor must have some insight, knowledge, that they have worth sharing. If I have a coworker of 30 years my senior, does it not behoove me to listen to how they've approached life to see how I can make it that far? What about a parent with high school graduates as kids? Would they be able to give me the best advice on how to do what they've done? The smaller children all just living life, while an adolescent boy hangs on with strife.  The expected answer is yes to all. Saying yes to the time one has served here and less on the quality of it. Unfortunately, there is no grade to life. There is no report card I can check on as a reference to how this person has done what they so apparently have done. Yes, they might have worked at the same job for 40 years, but does that necessarily make them good at it? Or does it ...

This is my list that I cam up with in 5 minutes this morning: Trusting. Balanced. Shopping lists. Honest feedback. Cute clothes for our daughter (stylish). Listens to me talk about the same stuff. A desire outside of herself to see people grow. Willing to listen to others. Balance with food I had never known before. Assertive. Spiritual. Indulges, just enough, of my childlike wonder. Appreciative Co-parents with respect to my wishes. Discusses differences. Funny (Not as much as me, but still) Appreciates creativity. Passionate. Hard-working. Shows me how to live in the middle (I tend to go all or nothing) Chosen from God (For I would not have known the qualities of a parent if it were up to me) Makes me better Makes me want to be better Goes along with my impulsive ideas just enough to see me fizzle out because she knows me. Resilient. Authentic. Shows emotion (even in her denial of her initial emotion) Comforts me, makes me feel small (physically) Sexy (...